So after a few tries, I think I'm getting a better idea of how to play this game.
I designed a custom map that I hoped would give me a better chance at getting a good start. First thing I did was axe the retarded Space Pirates. Listen, paying people off to attack your enemies is fun. But when you get Pirates sneaking to your homeworld and bombing the crap out of it, over and over and over, because you're the top dog and everyone else pays them off? Not good.
Then I jacked up the amount of neutral factions in habiting planets. I've found that these guys tend to be good roadblocks; they don't come attack you, but they resist the spread of other groups. A few neutral factions in the right places can really keep the other players in check.
I also got a lot better at trading, both within my own territories and those beyond. I place much more emphasis on getting those trade posts up, relying on the additional income to build up my fleet. As a result, it's much easier to become an economic powerhouse.
To a lesser extent, I've started using the Orbital Refineries, but they're a much later game structure. The research to get there is a little complex, but they're good add-ons as well to increase metal and crystal.
The game really is one of increments. There aren't points where you can blow the game wide open. Research improves things by 5% here, 10% there. Investing in Efficient Crystal Sorting can seem expensive at the beginning, but over time you recoup that investment and begin dominating in production. That patient buildup, more than anything I think, defines the game.
Oh, and massive fleets of warships.